So yes as you can see, I actually changed the entire layout of my blog (yes again) and it looks really pretty to me!! Bokeh lights everywhere. Just thought I would change it and ta-dahhhh, outcome so nice hehe ok la just let me praise myself for this. A random update because I'm actually feeling slightly down?
Does anyone ever know how it feels like to be there for someone, can be anyone, not necessarily anyone special, but yet when it was your turn to need someone, no one really came forward and said "hey I'm here. You alright?" Like never; not even call or drop you a text even after knowing there is something wrong with you. I wouldn't deny that there are the kind of people who has this mentality of "I believe that if there is something wrong with you, you would tell me when you want to, I won't force." And I am one of those. But sadly, there are times whereby human beings just need to hear that one sentence "are you okay?" and trust me, it will make them happy, in fact you'll lighten their mood at the end of it. They'll thank you someday in the future when they're better, trust me. Everyone needs everyone. I cannot understand how some people can just be as ignorant as fuck when it comes to another being's feeling? Aren't they human too?
I won't be afraid to share my experiences here, not going to bother if I ever get judged over this again because I had enough of this. Judge if you want, you don't know my story. So anyway, I've personally been through a few of this situations whereby I had almost no one next to me. One mistake I have, that anyone else shouldn't do, is that you have to learn to wait. It's not there there's exactly nobody there for you, maybe they just take slightly longer than how you get back to them when they needed you. Patience is key. You'll never want to behave like me, you are going to chase a whole lot of people away. DON'T EVER, DO THAT. Keep them close to you. But because I put myself before others 3/4 of the time, I tend to tell myself that it's okay and that never mind if there's no one. Let me tell you this - it is NOT okay. Don't deceive yourself like how I did. It's definitely not going to work out, not in the least. Know where you stand - yourself before anyone else sometimes. I can't do it because I apparently suck at it.
Always learn to treasure the people around you. In chinese, they call it 珍惜. Countless number of people told me that, and I thought it was really awakening though it's just 2 characters? It means a lot, the weightage of the meaning of the words do help you go a longer way in this case.
So much of ranting. I just want to say to anyone that's reading this - you are awesome being you, and don't let your thoughts eat you up. Stand firm in what you believe in, trust the right person, learn to give and love more, be nice to yourself, don't mistreat yourself in any way. You're beautiful/handsome, and I mean it. Never apologize for being you, for you're the only star in you that shines; don't let yourself down for you don't deserve to.
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