"One of the most hurtful moments was caused by you."
Before I start my post or anything, just let me rant everything out first.
It's okay with me if you don't wanna read, but comments are allowed, no nasty ones ok.
So yesterday was a total nightmare. I received many text messages out of a sudden. I was lost, yes. I didn't know what to do already. I only feel like crying and bursting out into tears, that's all I felt. Yes I know there are people who care, but it's time I'd think on my own already. I mean like what, I'm not a small kid, I should be able to know how to make my own decision for now already. I've always remembered what my girlfriend told me, it's the feeling that I've got to use, not something that I'm not used to it at all. But now that I've tried using the feeling to get what I want, it's not of any use anymore. I am just very afraid of love, afraid it'd trick me like how it did previously, afraid of how bad it's judgements are, afraid of everything practically. It all seems to real to be true now. I once thought to myself, just find me a couple, who lasted longer than me and him, and I'd prolly fall in love again in no time. But no, I was totally all wrong. Maybe I was too selfish or something, I don't know anymore.....
Ok so anyway, I haven't rant enough. But I just thought I'd go over to my private blog and rant on somemore? :) Only invited readers are allowed, HAHA.
I'll prolly invite like say around 2 only? Cos' I've already got Gay in it. So I'd thought I'll wanna include Nicole Sim in it, cos' she always wants to know everything, :)
Anyway, I was pretty much upset and confused and cocked up last night on my bed.
My hair was in a mess, my bed was in a mess, everything was in a mess.
I got up this morning and cleared everything, all the mess and so on. I was pissed off and all.
So ya, I went to find Gay because I know this fella is like one silly cute cartoon, can make me laugh in anyway no matter what.
And yes, I was right to find him. He made me laugh right after his first text message.
Which somewhat made me smiled widely till I slept. :)
His last sms was the best one, because I really did what I wanted best.
So ya in any case, thank you Gay so so so so so so so much. He's prolly one of the best brothers I'd ever have, and if I've got the chance, I'll put him first at the top of my list. :)
He's still at his best even though he's mischievous at times, plus his silly pokes, fancy carrying me and then slam me on the bed, -.-
But really, he's damn cartoon I tell you.
Dad and Mum are out to NTUC and to do some shopping.
I'll prolly go out tomorrow with Mum, cos' I need to get alot of stuffs huh.
Not sure where but, I'm just going out, that's final babeh.
Because I cannot take it stuffing up everything here, especially ahem*.
Gay you know what I am talking about right now right? HAHAHAHA, SMILES*.
Ok enough.
bye.